I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
