At least make sure they are 18
Why
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
