i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
