Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
