Dual....:-)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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