i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
