We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Ketchup is God's man juice
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
