Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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