I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
