We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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