high people should be assigned attendants
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
