Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
