so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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