He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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