i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
