i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
