can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
