i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
