I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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