I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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