Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
