I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
do nipples grow back?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
