guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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