You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize