are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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