I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
