i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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