Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
