I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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