Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
