absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
