They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
