He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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