fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
