I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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