you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
