haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
