doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
