Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
