Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
