fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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