Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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