around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
