No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
wow bdsm is so cute
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
