I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I love you.
Bad choice
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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