We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
