screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
