So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
