He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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