all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
