love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
